anthropodermic

Fustilugs------>A fat woman. Right, sorry I haven't been updating, something's been going on... Did a lot of soul-searching, so lots to talk about this post. Exams went well so far, got very high for the maths and science subjects and did ok in the others, so i'm quite happy... Downloaded LOTS of songs thanks to Ares, among my favourites are Simon Webbe- After all this time and Lee Ryan - When I think Of You. Awesome stuff.

So I've got my license, and I'm almost ready to drive on my own. Most of my friends are already driving here and there and everywhere, so naturally I would wanna drive too... Of course I also have my own reasons to drive, so I'm quite eager to drive out to the world on my own too... Getting my first accident, gettin lost for the first time and such. However, I dun think it'll be that easy. I still have responsibility issues, I also dunno why. Everytime I screw up, my mom talks about how I'm not gonna be able to survive on my own and such... It's so irritating. Eesh. It's not that I hate my mom for that, it's just that there's nothing really to say to her when she says that, and at the same time it's so hurtful... Maybe I need more stuff to do so that I become more responsible. I'm still a bubble-wrapped kid haha. Oh well.

Next thing I wanna talk about is one of the rare things that happen in my life. It's just one of those days when you wake up in such a bad mood that you don't wanna go to school, you don't wanna feel good, you don't wanna wake up, and you don't wanna SMILE. That's the worst thing that can happen to me. When I don't smile. I love to laugh, and when I can't I get really irritated with myself... My confidence drops, my temper becomes bad, I don't think I can even concentrate on stuff for long hours like studies or basketball... It's so weird. Luckily it happened this week, which is JUST after my tests. So there's nothing to lose really. However, there are little little things that can make me feel SO much better, like one day I felt so back when I woke up, I got such a headache and I felt like I had an empty void in my heart, like I feel like stoning all day. But what my friend Jeng did was that he bought me a pack of nasi lemak. Just that. After I ate that in school, my mood was SO much better, I felt so relaxed the whole day... This doesn't prove that nasi lemak makes me feel better. The next day I had the same one, and I didn't feel anything different... So I guess it's the thought that counts. I guess it's little things that can make my day, shows how significant they are.

Another thing that happened to me this week is that has quite affected me is the changes that have happened to the house. Not just physically, but emotionally as well. See now that I've got a new room, things have changed quite a lot... I'm still trying to get used to the new enviroment, can't sleep well... My grandmother's also very ill and around the house, so the family is a lot busier... She gets very lonely during the day coz everyone's out, so everyone sacrifices time to keep her company... So it made me wonder a bit whether we could've done anything about her while she was well, so everyone's learnt to treasure each other better...

Yea, this port is suppoed to be longer, dun worry, will update more next post real soon with pictures.